̶ LOS ANGELES DAILY NEWS
Junior Bender may be the smartest guy in Tinseltown, and he’s well aware of it. Living in a different motel every night, and with ears turned to the proverbial ground, Junior is always one step ahead of everyone. You see, Junior Bender is a very talented burglar. He’s the sort who knows the difference between a real Paul Klee and a real bad deal. But LA’s smug prince of thieves is about to find himself stuck with just that: a deal so raw that even a ravenous guard dog would turn up its nose.
After committing a routine burglary involving the aforementioned Klee (which he was hired to steal) and a diamond necklace (which he just had to have), Junior thinks he’s pulled the perfect caper once again. This time, he's wrong.
Trey Annunziato, one of the most powerful crime bosses in LA, has caught Junior on film only to blackmail him into acting as a private investigator on the set of Trey's new porn flick, which someone keeps trying to sabotage. The star of Trey's adult movie was formerly America's most beloved child actor, Thistle Downing. Thistle, now living alone in a drug-induced stupor, is destitute and uninsurable. Her starring role will be the scandalous fall-from-grace gossip of rubberneckers across the country. No wonder Trey needs help keeping the production on track.
Junior knows what he should do—get Thistle out and find her help—but doing the right thing will land him on the wrong side of LA's scariest mob boss. With the help of his precocious twelve-year-old daughter, Rina, and his criminal sidekick, Louie the Lost (an ex-getaway driver who, er, got lost while driving getaway), Junior has to figure out a miracle solution. Then again, he is supposed to be the smartest guy in Hollywood.
̶ SHADOE STEVENS, LATE LATE SHOW WITH CRAIG FERGUSON